At the end of the day, I usually want to be alone. Detached with my thoughts and free from arms tugging at me. I got into this mindset that the night time was “me time”, but recently I realized there was someone else still awake and ready for time with me.
My husband.
Yes, self-care is crucial, in fact, I just wrote about taking the time to care for yourself; but nurturing the relationships with our partners is another kind of self-care. It keeps our number one relationship at the top of our priority list instead of falling away from it.
Peter and I started integrating quality conversation with menial tasks that needed to get accomplished. Free from electric devices, we let the moment take us. And even if we sit in silence, we are together:
Work Out With Your Partner: It is nearly impossible for us to workout away from home, partly because I know our “alone time” together is limited. So, we bought a weight set and have been lifting as a team. Talk is usually not a part of this time together, rather, encouragement and a celebratory smack on the butt for pushing through 5 extra reps.
Enhance Your Home Together: A little music and some caulk can go a long way in a relationship. In my mind, home improvement is one of the best ways to challenge and positively build upon my bond with Peter. Plus, we are not only caring for each other, but for our home. Some of our best (and amusing) memories as a couple involve DIY projects.
Fold the Laundry Together: Why I have pleasant thoughts about Peter and myself in our early years washing our skivvies at a laundry mat is still a mystery to me. With no television in sight, we sat side by side reading or chatting, stealing a kiss or two in between folding our delicates and shaking out our towels. That kind of uninterrupted and youthful crush can still be had; just after all the little people in the house have gone to bed.
In what ways do you capture romance in everyday moments?
I have this saying I always say to my son before we go on dates. I tell him that “mommy and daddy need time alone so that we can love each other more, and when mommy and daddy love each other more we can love you more.” When you are happy in your marriage the whole house is usually happy. I recently started working out with my husband and it is great bonding time for us. It is almost relaxing to just do something productive with him.
Oh, Tanya! I LOVE the explanation you give your son! Good to know someone else is working out with the spouse. Thank you so much for reading and sharing.
-Elizabeth